Did you just give birth, and you’re struggling to ignite the long-quenched fire you had with your husband before birth, that you are more concerned about how to bring back romance with husband after baby?
You both use to be all over each other and just can’t have enough but all that disappeared after you had your baby and you are looking to bring back that kind of romance. This article got you covered on what you need to know about romance with your husband after baby birth.
Having a baby shouldn’t quench the ecstatic moment you share with your husband, you know right? It’s okay if you decide to stop the spontaneous romance around the house for the sake of the baby and maybe, the babysitter but it’s not okay to allow your romance and sex life to grow cold after having a baby.
Baby’s arrival comes with lots of chores, especially for the women but it pays to balance things up, that way, you will get to spend time with both the baby and your husband. What this means is that you will need to put in extra effort. It’s not an easy task but it’s a worthy one that deserves your utmost attention.
In this article, you will get to know what you will do to bring back the hot and juicy romantic moments you enjoyed with your husband before having your baby.
Sex After Baby – What You Need to Know
After having a baby, it’s often very difficult for most mothers to get their bodies and soul ready to resume romance with their partner.
Sometimes, sex and romance somehow grow wings and fly from their mind; they seldom include romance with their husbands in the list of their priorities.
This might be due to their body undergoing moments of recovery from the rigorous nine months’ journey.
The rest is needed for some time, but keeping your husband’s arm waiting for so long isn’t wise at all, you need to go back to him, and bring back the fire that you both had.
But before then, there are things that you must know before you have sex with your husband after delivery.
Below is everything you need to know before going back to the moon with your husband:
1. You might experience low libido
This shouldn’t attack your esteem! It is very common among new moms, and it’s usually due to some known factors.
Estrogen levels and tiredness from the activities that come with being a mom play a part. Also, the nerves that bring sensation to the pelvis get released during the process of child delivery. It could also contribute to the low libido issue.
Oxytocin is a hormone that activates good feelings and enables bonding between a mother and a child, and at the same time, it reduces a woman’s urge for sex or romance.
The big part is that this hormone is released by breastfeeding. Now, you know why most breastfeeding mothers pay more attention to their babies than their husbands.
The solution isn’t allowing your esteem to be smashed or distancing yourself from your husband; you know that won’t help the situation in any way.
Communication does the job well. Help your husband to understand these things and you both will walk through this confidently.
2. You might bleed during sex
One of the things you should expect while having sex with your husband after having a baby is minor bleeding. But you need not to worry as your body uses that means to get rid of extra blood, mucus, and tissue that were essential during pregnancy.
The process is called Lochia. Vaginal dryness might also cause this. You must not panic when this happens but if it goes beyond normal, quickly consult your doctor.
3. You might experience a change in the vagina
Of course, there should be. I mean, you just brought forth a human being through your vagina, changes must occur.
Even if you delivered your baby via C-section, you will already register changes down there because the pregnancy hormone widens the pelvic rim.
Your vagina might not be as right as it used to be, you and your husband must understand this.
4. You might experience milk leakage when you orgasm
You are a mom now, and the breast milk is ready to flow at any slightest provocation. During orgasm, oxytocin which is the same hormone that triggers breast milk while breastfeeding gets activated, resulting in leakage of milk.
To avoid this, you should try pumping your breast milk or breastfeeding your baby properly before going into sex.
5. It may hurt a bit
Especially if you had a tear that is yet to heal completely. Also, vaginal dryness could cause this as well. You are advised to stop and visit your doctor once you witness excruciating pain during intercourse after 8 weeks of delivery.
Read Also: What Happens If You Don’t Wait 6 Weeks After Birth?
10 Ways to Keep Romance Alive With your Husband After Baby Birth
Romance and sex aren’t enough to keep your relationship with your husband going but they play a solid part in helping your souls to bond and so, you shouldn’t neglect these aspects of your relationship.
Trying to keep the romance alive in a relationship doesn’t seem to be a topic during the first year of marriage. Most couples sustain the butterflies during the first year and most lose theirs immediately after a baby shows up but it is not supposed to be so.
Romance between couples should last as long as they live. They should put in effort to keep the flame burning.
Below are the 10 ways to keep romance alive with your husband after baby:
1. Shower together
Have you had bathroom sex before? You should try it often with your husband. You know why?
It sticks to their memory like glue. It will help him to retain sweet memory of you throughout the day and that is so cool. This mustn’t happen each time you shower together, but ensure you create a beautiful experience for the both of you at all times. Don’t miss a chance!
2. Cook together
A lot of things happen while you cook together with your husband. It helps to ignite a fire as well as build a lasting friendship between you two.
This moment shouldn’t just end at cutting vegetables and blending grains, you should be innovative with what you do. Think of something naughty; something like hugging his behind and allowing your hands to ransack his every part. Make sure your older children are not within if you have any.
3. Forget Your Parent Roles
This seems like bad advice, right? This doesn’t mean that you should forget about your baby totally to focus on your husband.
It simply suggests that you should suspend your role as a mom for a while and give your husband what he really deserves.
You can hire a babysitter for the weekend to take care of the newborn while you gift your husband your time, body, and love. It isn’t that difficult.
4. Get naked
Well, you’ve got to go down with your husband. Your baby shouldn’t be a hindrance to your wifey and hubby’s time in the bedroom.
You have to let your souls connect often to keep the fire burning and nothing else does it better than initiating and having good sex with him.
Let him feel your skin around him, and make it memorable for him. I bet he will keep thinking about it all day.
5. Plan a weekend getaway
You can only do this if your baby is about 6 months and can stay away from you without falling sick. Book a room in a nice hotel not so close to the house and spend time with your husband. Remember, the goal is to create beautiful memories that will keep the flame burning.
6. Go down memory lane together
This might sound boring if you have never tried it. Conclude with your mommy duties early enough, shower with your husband, and cuddle with him tightly.
While at it, remind him of how you both started, how he confessed his feelings, and how you felt. The challenges you both conquered and the places you loved to visit. These things remind him of why he wanted you and how desperately he needs you.
7. Love him rightly
While some men’s love language is physical touch, others are acts of service or words of affirmation. It’s your job to find out how best your husband wants to be loved and when you find out, love him that way. He will get the message faster that way.
8. Support him
Men too deserve to be pampered. The emotional and physical state of a man affects his sex life. Support him in every aspect; emotionally, financially, socially, and spiritually.
If you have a balanced husband, keeping romance alive in your relationship won’t be a chore because he will always respond.
9. Maintain the habit of getting sweet gifts for your partner
This usually flies out of the window for most couples. Once they tie the knot, they stop gifting each other as they used to. It’s very easy to shift the focus from your husband to your children, but you should remember that he is still number one on the list.
10. Welcome him with a hug and smile
Even when you don’t feel like it, welcome him with a cheerful look. That will make him know that he was missed and his presence means a lot to you. It’s a very simple attitude to cultivate but a very rewarding one.
How to Bring Back Romance With Husband After Baby
Now, to the real gist!
Below are practical ways to bring back romance with your husband after having your baby. You must understand that it takes patience to build or rebuild anything that would last and your sex life isn’t out of it.
While following these tips, ensure you follow through, step by step, that way, you give yourself the time you need to do better.
Here are 5 simple tips on how to bring back romance with your husband after baby birth:
1. Go on dates
Leave the baby at home with a trusted relative and spend a few hours with your husband away from home. It doesn’t have to be in a very expensive hotel, you can organize a two-man picnic, order your favorite dishes and enjoy the moment together. Make it memorable and don’t allow negativity.
2. Practice home and personal hygiene
A lot happens after having a baby, your chore increases, and the tendency that your home will not be as organized as it used to be will be there. But you still need to try to keep the surroundings and yourself clean.
Before he returns, take your bath, put on some inviting fragrance, wear that red lingerie and wait for him.
Most women lost their husbands due to dirtiness and I’m sure you don’t want to be included. If it’s too much for you to handle, hire a babysitter.
3. Don’t forget the bathroom escapades
Yeah! This works for both sides. It will help to bring back romance and also help to maintain it. You’re free to get real naughty with your husband while in there. The rule is to make it fun and memorable. Spark up the man inside of him and watch him display.
4. Initiate a pillow fight
Childish right? It sounds childish now because you now have a baby right? Well, it isn’t. This will help you two to relate well. It’s a preparatory ground for perfect romantic moments. Play with pillows, fall on each other, say sweet things to each other, and flow from there.
5. Tell him sweet things
The cliché, “men are drawn by only what they see” doesn’t work at all times. Just like the female gender, men love to be appreciated, they love to hear their women say sweet things to them too. Some might not admit it at first but sweet words from the women they love truly make them go haywire.
Read Also: 20 Things New Moms Need For Themselves
FAQ
How Can I Attract My Husband After Having a Baby?
It’s simple. The best way to attract your husband after having a baby is to go back to doing those things that attracted him to you in the first place. What did he like most about you when you both first met?
This question will help you get your husband’s attention.
If you were a stylish lady but stopped paying attention to your hairdo, nails, and your dress sense after having your baby, going back to being the woman your husband desired will help you out.
How Do I Get Intimacy Back In My Marriage After Having a Baby?
There is a list of things to do to get intimacy back in your marriage after having a baby, and one of them is creating time for your husband.
Spending time together as a couple will help to erase the possibility of falling apart.
Make out time to go on dates, make out time to have sex with him, and give him the time to make you his often. That way, intimacy will be restored.
Read Also: How to Satisfy Your Husband After Giving Birth
How to Spice Up Your Love Life After Having a Baby
What were the things you both enjoyed doing before the baby arrived? It’s best you get back to those things and even be more innovative this time.
You can cook together, wash together, go to the movies, weekend getaway, whatever it is, just have fun doing it. But remember, there are things you aren’t allowed to do when the kids are around (if you have any). You can send them to your relative’s if you both want to get naughty.
How to Get Back In the Mood After Having a Baby
When it comes to reconditioning the mind for sex after childbirth, effort must be made and diet also plays a role. To back in the mood, you have to first agree with yourself that you are ready to go back. Your ready mind will help to get your body ready.
Sensualize your environment. Take some fruits that will help boost your libido and that of your husband.
Bringing back romance, keeping it alive, and being attractive to your husband after having your baby is a good investment of time and energy.
Don’t be disappointed if the process isn’t going as fast as you want. Just give it time and you will enjoy your union like never before.